I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
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