i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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