sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
