I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
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