i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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