Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
Bring me that man meat
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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