I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
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