Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
