I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
two words: eviction party
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
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