so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
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