yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
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