Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
Randomize
