He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Randomize
