Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
