i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
