just sent my roommate on a cheese run
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
These Are The 21 Strangest Sexual Fantasy Confessions
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"