in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
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