Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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