So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize
