Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Randomize
