if i can run in heels then i can drive
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
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