I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
