Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Randomize
