420 ftw
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Randomize