I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Congratulations! We have a period
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