I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize
