just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
