By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
