You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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