marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
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