Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I need to sanitize my soul.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
