So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
