Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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