this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
