new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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