lets start a swedish sibling band together
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
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