i don't like sucking hair
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
Randomize
