Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
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