i barfeds in our rink
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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