im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
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