Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Randomize
