i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Randomize
