please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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