I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
