If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize