he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
Randomize
