So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
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