she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize
