those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
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