I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
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