what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
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