69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
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