WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
I intend to get homeless drunk
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
Randomize
