Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
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